God's Design for a Healthy, Happy, Uplifting Marriage

Preface

I was standing at the end of an alley, with a beautiful young woman on my arm wearing a magnificent dress. I was about to climb the few steps that would change my life and his life forever. Today it's my youngest daughter, Heather's turn. Eight months earlier, it was that of Janice, my eldest daughter. For now, I am her father and I will give her to the man who will become her husband. In a few minutes, I will be his pastor, and declare them man and wife. For now, I hold his hand and simultaneously remember his little childish fingers. All too soon, the man she loves will put his ring on one of her fingers. At the other end of the aisle, alongside my married daughter, stands her mother beaming with pride. It's hard to believe that so many years have passed since she, too, stood at the end of an alley, preparing to become my wife. I thought I knew everything about love then, but the love we share today is much richer and deeper. I have officiated hundreds of weddings; Over the years, I have assisted many couples preparing for marriage. I have spent countless hours with couples whose marriages were mired in confusion or failing due to conflict. But the feeling is completely different when your own children commit to marriage. When I married Elizabeth, no one thought it necessary to give us premarital advice. It was assumed that because we were part of good families, had models of stable marriages around us, and were committed to following Christ, everything would work out well. These assumptions were doubtful at the time; they would have no meaning today. Many marriages around us are disintegrating at an alarming rate. Good intentions are not enough to build a strong marriage. Building a strong marriage is an undertaking that can be just as daunting in today's culture as in any other time in history. However, God does not abandon us to our own devices. He gives us in his Word, the Bible, the promise of life, proven wisdom on how to found and cultivate a prosperous and satisfying marital relationship. This book was written with the belief that the God who created marriage has given us the basic information necessary for our needs. This information can obviously be supplemented with the best knowledge of counselors, therapists and researchers, but it is God who establishes the fundamental principles behind healthy marriages. For this reason, we will focus our attention on understanding the biblical truths that are the basis of marriage according to God's plan. We will discover that his Word is practical, relevant and penetrating. Writing this book would not have been possible without the loving presence of my wife, Elizabeth, in my life. Through her life more than through her words, she taught me a vast majority of the most powerful truths I have learned. I am deeply grateful. I am also grateful for many friendships, a source of wisdom and encouragement. I extend special thanks to Ginny Otis, for her careful work in preparing the manuscript, and to the dear Christian congregation and pastoral team at Trinity Church; all were remarkable servants for us. As you read these pages, I pray that the Spirit of God will open your eyes to the truths of His Word so that they will have a transformative impact within your marriage. , and may it give you a heart eager to faithfully follow Christ in a deeper understanding of what it is to live a marriage for the glory of God.